Are you there God? It’s Margaret…

April 10, 2008

Did anyone read the book I’m reffering to in my title?

When I was in my teens I used to be quite rebellious towards adults and their view of life.  I couldn’t stand when they would tell me what life is about and how to live it, i wanted to experience it myyself.

I think the area I rebelled in the most was religion. I read a lot about it and always questioned the blind faith mentality they were trying to force upon us at the Catholic school and church. I remember when our local priest came to talk to us about our confirmation in grade 8. A friend and I were able to debate with him on every point the came up with. After about half an hour of this he got so angry at us he just stormed out of the classroom. I mean it was pretty unheard of to argue with a Catholic priest on the finer points of religion.

Our teacher ended up yelling at us for another half hour and asked us to opt out of confirmation if we had such issues with the catholic religion. The point there with me wasn’t that I didn’t believe in it. I was just looking for something more. I think that when one starts questioning their religion and faith it is actually growing and maturing. I was just ready for something more than bible stories and parables.

No one offered to help expand my faith and I grew to resent the Catholic church. I stopped going to mass every Sunday and I spent the rest of my life disproving church myths and traditions. I think a lot of it has to do with that particular priest. He refused to marry an interracial couple even though they were both Catholic. He refused confession to someone who was living common law. He gave single mothers lectures on how he doesn’t care that they have to work two jobs they still need to get to church on time. I even witnessed him asking a mother to leave mass because her baby was crying. It was just all so contradictory to me with what the bible had to say on these topics.

I know not all priests are like that but those experiences left such a sour taste in my mouth that I just couldn’t bother. To be honest it was easier that way for me as well. I could sleep in on Sundays and could push back guilt for my many sins.

Now as I get older I find myself wanting to try again. I have started calling on my faith and God lately during hard times. I didn’t even realise how much that has been helping me until recently. There are still things I do not agree with in the Catholic church itself but I think we’d both be willing to make a compromise.


2 Responses to “Are you there God? It’s Margaret…”

  1. It’s always sad when Christians (of any denomination) are not ready to question things about their faith. I’m sure it’s better to have a strong faith and I think this comes through facing up to the tough issues that sometimes its easier to ignore.
    I’m actually quite conservative in my Christian beliefs but I’ve raked over the issues, faced the tough questions and made my choice. So many people avoid this.
    I’m of the opinion that if God can’t take a few difficult questions perhaps he isn’t worth following.
    I’m afraid I haven’t read the book but I just wanted to show my support for your searching out God. I’m sure you are taking the right approach.


  2. Jodi said

    Hi Dori,
    I can completely sympathize with your disallusionment at the Catholic church. I grew up in a Protestant church where the people I looked up to proved equally disappointing in many cases. I’ve come to know that although people will often let us down, God is faithful and loving and always waiting and longing for us to turn to Him. You probably know from the board that I’m a Christian, but I just wanted to let you know that if you ever have any questions, or you’d just like to dialogue a bit about the Bible and God, I would welcome an e-mail anytime. I’m glad you’ve been finding comfort in calling on God in times of need. He is real and He is listening!

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